The Hunt

I am pretty sure over the past few weeks I have read every single job ad in every paper and website in Perth.

It has brought me up to speed with just how many odd jobs there are out there and how crazy the advertisements for jobs can be. Amongst the hairdresser, engineer, and checkout operator vacancies are the more dubious, eye-brow raising Beveller, Chicken Boner and Bread Merchandiser. My imagination runs wild at just what they might be..
and then there are the job descriptions themselves. One ad announces - Labratory Technican 'Kick start your career in soil testing...' I'm sorry what?!

There are the ads that call for

'Young ENERGETIC, sales LEGENDS needed for modern, up and coming, VIBRANT, business in HEART of CITY. No Exp. Nec. All trainging provided. Earn BIG bucks.'

Yeah OK, doing WHAT? capitalising EVERYTHING?

Remarkably simple sounding jobs also require truckloads more experience and training than ever before. For instance it apparently takes a minimum of 2 to 3 years experience to understand the mechanisms and demanding tasks of Grocery Store Fruit and Veg Assistant. Groundskeepers now require a certificate III in Turf Management. Turf Management.

Don't get me wrong, I understand all jobs require a degree of knowledge, skill and ability, but must they really require a Degree?

Local government job titles are probably the most pompous sounding. Property maintenance supervisor, strategic town planner. As opposed to the non-strategic town planners that is, don't want any of them thankyou.

So I remain the House Couch Maintenance Officer (aka. semi-unemployed) battling fiercely through the mountains of bizarre job descriptions... Over and Out.